Relationships play a crucial role in our well-being, shaping our happiness, emotional security, and sense of self-worth. While no relationship is perfect, a healthy relationship should be built on respect, trust, and open communication. Unfortunately, some relationships can become unhealthy or even abusive, often
in ways that are difficult to recognize at first. If you or someone you know is questioning whether a relationship is healthy, unhealthy, or abusive, this guide can help identify key signs.
Signs of a Healthy Relationship
A healthy relationship—whether romantic, family, or friendship—should uplift and support both people involved. Some signs of a healthy relationship include:
- Mutual Respect – Both individuals value each other’s opinions, boundaries, and autonomy. Differences are accepted, not criticized.
- Open Communication – You feel comfortable expressing your thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment or retaliation. Disagreements are resolved through honest, respectful conversations.
- Trust and Honesty – There is no need for constant checking in, spying, or accusations. Both individuals feel secure in the relationship.
- Support and Encouragement – Partners or friends celebrate each other’s successes and offer comfort in difficult times. No one feels held back or discouraged from achieving their goals.
- Equality in Decision-Making – Both people have an equal say in major decisions. No one dominates or controls the other’s choices, whether about finances, work, or social life.
- Personal Independence – A healthy relationship allows both people to maintain friendships, hobbies, and interests outside of the relationship.
- Feeling Safe – There is no fear of harm, control, or manipulation. You feel emotionally and physically secure at all times.
Signs of an Unhealthy or Toxic Relationship
Not all unhealthy relationships involve physical abuse. Some warning signs that a relationship is unhealthy include:
- Frequent Criticism and Belittling – One person constantly puts the other down, making them feel worthless, unattractive, or incapable.
- Lack of Trust and Constant Jealousy – A partner or friend checks your phone, accuses you of cheating, or demands to know where you are at all times.
- Controlling Behaviour – One person dictates what the other wears, who they spend time with, or where they go.
- Blame and Guilt-Tripping – A partner blames you for their bad moods or mistakes, making you feel responsible for their actions.
- Gaslighting – The person manipulates the truth to make you doubt your own experiences, feelings, or memories.
- Isolation from Friends and Family – You are discouraged or forbidden from seeing loved ones, making you feel alone or dependent on the relationship.
- Fear or Walking on Eggshells – You constantly worry about how the other person will react and try to avoid upsetting them.
When Does an Unhealthy Relationship Become Abusive?
If an unhealthy relationship escalates into intimidation, threats, or violence, it becomes abusive. Abuse can take many forms:
- Physical abuse – Hitting, pushing, restraining, or causing bodily harm. Emotional and psychological abuse – Threats, humiliation, mind games, or controlling behaviors. Sexual abuse – Forced or unwanted sexual activity. Financial abuse – Controlling money, limiting access to resources, or making someone financially dependent.
Abuse is never acceptable. If you recognize these signs, know that you are not alone, and support is available.
What Can You Do?
If you are in an unhealthy or abusive relationship, or know someone who is, here are some steps you can take:
- Talk to someone you trust – A friend, family member, or community support worker. Seek professional support – Reach out today at 0800207000 to speak to a professional at DRC. All services are free of charge and confidential. Know your rights – Legal protections may be available if you are experiencing abuse. Prioritize your safety – If you are in immediate danger, seek help from emergency services at 112
You deserve to feel safe, respected, and valued in all your relationships. If something doesn’t feel right, trust your instincts and reach out for help.